The Last Connection
- Melody De Vivero
- Jul 28, 2019
- 6 min read
Updated: Aug 2, 2019
Who are you?
What's your story?
In a small rural, Mississippi town a third and last child is born on a family farm. In late May of 1933, in middle of the night, while crossing the Mississippi and Tennessee state line, a young mother unexpectedly dies. She doesn't make it to the hospital in time. She is survived by a husband with three young children all under the age of five. Her story, her links to immediate family and her last connections tragically fade with the memory of her. Any knowledge of her beginnings, family friends, favorite flower or her special dress is gone. For the youngest, the only tangible thing to survive is a crumbling old black and white photograph. Edges torn, pin marked and faded.
If someone came across your last picture 60 years from now, what would it say about you? Would anyone be able to extrapolate who you are by that one image? A few may or may not know over the last few years I have become somewhat of a family historian. The primary curator of our family tree. It was not a position that I had ever desired or was trained in how to do. The whole genealogy Ancestry, DNA finding lost relatives thing kind of fell in my lap and snowballed into this fascinating and at times heartbreaking journey. I have added so many leaves and branches to my family tree that I have been able to assist others with their research. I have inadvertently realized that knowing my family history is a powerful intangible qualifier of how I came into existence. This adventure has been multifariously humbling. I have the utmost respect for my ancestors and the lives that they lived.
The stories.
Each time I find a new picture of a relative I am introduced to a different time, a new world and life that is strikingly unfamiliar. It's an opportunity to study and analyze subtle details in the subjects face and imagine what life might have been like for them.
Recently I was asked to restore my father's parents original images so that they could be placed at his bedside in his nursing home. The images are over a hundred years old. They were deteriorating and fading. My father has cherished these images all his life. His mother's photo is the only thing he has of her because she died unexpectedly when he was an infant. This photograph is all he has of her existence. His last connection to her. Neither photograph would be considered high quality by today's standards. My grandparents appear quietly silent bearing no smile. Characteristically this was pretty common for the era. My grandfather posed in his WWI army uniform in Chambéry, France after the war. He sent this photo as a postcard to one of his sisters residing in Tennessee. He looked so handsome. Perhaps he found some random french photographer set up on the side of the road with a camera and convinced my grandfather to have his portrait done. However the photograph came about I'm glad these two strangers met and agreed to capture the moment. My grandmother is modestly sitting down holding a book on her lap, wearing a long coat trimmed with fur around the collar, posed in front of an understated backdrop. How old she was, the location and when the photograph was taken is a mystery. I can't assume anything about her because I know nothing about her. This one simple pose tells me nothing of her personality, where she was or if she liked the flower that was strategically placed on her coat. It could have been a special occasion for all I know and that's why she decided to be photographed. The image gives me no hint of whether or not she was a mother already. If she was happy or sad, quiet or loud, having a good hair day or whether she was mad at my grandfather before taking the photo? Who knows? lol. Her clothing and hairstyle tell a story of the era. Perhaps a historian could tell me more about the typical lifestyles of people from that era to give me some clue of why people looked the way they did during that time. But for now, I don't know more than what the photo represents in its purest form. It is my grandmother and maybe that is all that I need to know.
Onward.
I completed the process of restoring the images to preserve them as best I could given that they were in terrible shape.
Most of the time we never think about whether someone will be here tomorrow. With the growing number of people using smartphones as their cameras, special moments can be captured continuously without hesitation. Personal and intimate photos can immediately end up on social media before they are ever printed out or placed in a picture frame. But if a digital image file becomes corrupted, not backed up properly or someone loses their phone well that's the end of that. Preservation is key in ensuring that our most precious memories live on long after we are gone.
In one of my previous post, I wrote about my Peru trip with my husband's family. It was a really amazing trip. I shared some of my travel photos. I also mentioned that I had taken a ton of family photos. Good thing that I did because my father in law had lost his camera while we were there. I felt his pain because the thought of losing family images can be agonizing. I felt more assured that I had made the right decision to take my camera on the trip. The images of him and his sisters were so incredibly special. And they took on a more significant meaning after we had left. Not long after our visit one of his dear sisters was called home and passed. Every time I look at this photo I see a love story between siblings. I can't find adequate words to convey that kind of connection. This picture allows me to imagine them as children even though I had only met one of his sisters on her one time visit to California. But somehow this one image gives a glimmer of their very special relationship.
One of my most significant connections with family and photographs has to be the unexpected discovery of my great grandmother on my father's side. As previously mentioned my grandmother passed when my father was an infant. Her story and family history died with her. Up until about two years ago, I had no connection with her side of the family. I had incomplete information about the siblings and origins of her birth. So through the beauty of Ancestry DNA, I was able to find some descendants from one of my grandmother's siblings. They could confirm some information about the family which was great. I had names but no photographs. About 3 months ago, I received an unexpected message from a new member that showed up in my DNA results. Upon review of the message and the person's tree, I had stumbled upon the greatest find and surprise. Never in a million years would I have thought that I would ever see a photograph of my great grandmother and a sibling of my grandmother. It was glorious. Though the quality is not great it's the most precious photograph. I am so grateful to have been able to see it. And share it with the rest of my family. We have two more family members to be grateful for and wonder about.
If there is anything that I have learned from this experience is to encourage people to care for old photographs or videos that you want preserved, save them, digitize them and back up any disc or USB thumb drive that you have because if they ever get lost or corrupted they are irreplaceable. Hopefully, this post will resonate and someone will remember that their maybe someone in the future, a curious descendant much like myself that will be interested in seeing what you and the family looked like and will want to know the family story. Do your best to capture memories and take the foremost care to keep your precious photographs preserved.
Final Thoughts.
Most everyone has an image of themselves or family portraits hanging on their walls or sitting on their desk. What do these photographs represent? Who are you? What's your story?
If you liked this post and want to be kept in the loop on future post please subscribe. Feel free to share this post with friends. If you would like to keep up with Mahogany Rose Photography or follow me on Instagram or my Facebook page. If you're looking for a portrait photographer for family portraits, engagement/couples in love, birthday, anniversary, maternity or senior portraits, I would be happy to assist you. You can contact me via photosbymahogany@gmail.com or visit my homepage and fill out the contact form located below.
~Melody
Comments